Smitten Seahawks

‘Tis February, and although the dreaded weather continues to baffle us, there are two days that many look forward to, providing us refuge from the dreary and bipolar climate: Headmaster’s Holiday and Valentine’s Day. The latter, however, remains contentious at Seabury. Everyone remembers bashfully exchanging candy and notes as children, but on a day in which many teenagers seem preoccupied with their relationships, how does the small environment affect dating?

Some wise Seahawks share their views. “On the bright side, you’re dating someone, which is always better than not dating someone,” says junior Malcolm Maude. “On the not-so-bright side, you kind of have to interact with them every day. Like if you break up, you have to interact with them basically every day, especially if they’re in the same grade and you have classes together. Interacting with them all the time can be an awesome learning experience, but it also kind of sucks.”

It is common knowledge that dating in a small community can have more than one downside. Often, for example, lower schoolers are warned that breakups can end awkwardly, which is exacerbated by everyone’s close proximity to their peers. Is it worth it?

“It’s not really awkward, I honestly kind of like it better because it’s easier to be together, and it’s easier to just have classes together and spend time together, when it’s not just outside of school,” says junior Gabby Aubel. “I think the upsides are seeing each other all the time and passing between classes. We always hang out, whether it’s at school concerts or just in class or during lunch. There’s not really time not to be together, but the downside is everyone, like all the teachers and everyone are kind of involved, just because it’s not something you can necessarily hide or keep to yourself.”

A potential issue is that you might easily get tired of people while seeing them so often. Although this makes dating people from other schools look more appealing, there are various opinions on this topic.

“I think dating outside of Seabury is a good and safe option,” says senior Olivia Wilhelm. “But if you’re going to date someone at Seabury, it’s better if they’re not in your grade.”

A common argument against dating at Seabury is how your relationship becomes just as public as if you were in a tabloid at the grocery store. Lower school students are forewarned of how rapidly information spreads around the small community, and the comparison to “wildfire” is often used. But is this that big of a disadvantage?

“Stuff spreads, like, instantly,” says sophomore Harrison Hartzler. “Everyone knows everything, and it’s hard to keep secrets.”

Alas, although it may seem there are a myriad of downsides to dating at Seabury, have no fear; there are still positive aspects to the small community as well, and many who advocate for the positive outweighing the negative.

“I think the downsides are there’s not many people, and everybody hears about everything very quickly,” says senior Lee Nelson. “But the upsides are that you know everybody, and you’re close with a lot of people, and it’s easier to date someone and find someone that you truly like.”

One plus side to dating in a condensed environment is that you already know everything about everybody and thus know right off the bat if they are dateable or not. Additionally, it is easier to spend more time with them.

“It definitely has its pros and cons,” says sophomore Aris Grady. “With the small environment, it makes it easier to talk to people, and you’re definitely around people all day, so it’s easier to get to know them, which makes dating more in tune to happen. It’s bound to happen in such a small environment, but also at the same time, breakups can be harder and rumors can be harder.”

So does the good outweigh the bad?

“I mean, the small environment doesn’t matter as much as how much you like the person,” says junior Ethan Hall. Thus, since there are a variety of opinions, you should go for it (if you want to).